The Deadlies: Pride

             

           When pride comes, then comes disgrace, but with humility comes wisdom. 

Proverbs 11:2

Pride, at the root of the first sin, is often what underlies all others. Pride is fundamentally refusal to submit to God, and the Fall in genesis is illustrative of that. We know what happened to Adam and Eve, the disgrace that follows pride.

Saint Gregory the Great wrote "Pride, the queen of vices, when it has vanquished and captured the heart, forthwith delivers it into the hands of its lieutenants the seven principal [i.e. deadly] vices, that they may despoil it and produce vices of all kinds." (Morals xxxi, 45) It is the insidious general sin that lurks inside and manifests in many ways.

Humility is the antidote. The Catechism of the Catholic Church teaches "humility is the foundation of prayer." (CCC 2559) When we prostrate ourselves in adoration, we place ourselves in right relationship to God. It is a basic act of humility.

In practical terms, the deep desire to be in control conflicts with humility. Jesus has given us the best example. It isn't an accident that the temptations in the desert (Luke 4:1-13) come right after His baptism by John. The devil prods him, "IF you are the Son of God" to test whether or not He is and whether or not he can be bent to the enemy's will. Jesus doesn't bite. He answers every offer remaining obedient to his father's will and reminding all of us, "Him alone shall you worship."

The entire arc of the spiritual life could be described as the gradual emptying out of self in order to be filled with God. Wait? Isn't that the temptation in the Garden again? No. We are called to be like God and with God but not to BE him or to be above him.

The temptation lurks and often becomes even more insidious as we progress in virtue. To take pride in our virtuous acts as if we are the author of them, rather than that they are powered by God's grace acting through us is one way the enemy uses pride to undermine goodness.

And yet, God gives us gifts, prosperity, and talents for his own reasons and for his service. Gratitude is one way to remember that our success are not ours. We aren't asked to hide our gifts under a bushel but to remember where they came from. True humility is to say my voice glorifies Him in song because He wills it. Or my business has prospered by his grace and He shows me how to use it for good. Or I must write the best stories I can and use His gift as effectively as I can for His service.

It's complicated. If you want a detailed picking apart of pride, humility, and the pitfalls, try Saint Thomas Aquinas, Summa Theologiae, Secunda Secundae Partis, Question 162.

Catherine of Siena is reputed to have heard God tell her, "I am He who is God. You are she who is not."  Sometimes just remembering that helps. I am she who is not.

GRAPHIC: Adam and Eve Temptation by the Serpent mediaeval painted panel on wood nave ceiling Ely Cathedral Photograph by David Lyons

Darkness

For you Lord give light to my lamp; my God brightens my darkness.

Psalm 18:29

Some periods of life are murkier than others.  Having changed my life utterly and completely, there is an opportunity to rebuild it. God, as always, hasn't sent blueprints.  The potential for growth is enormous; the darkness, smothering at times.

Do I pray more? Seek religious community? Reduce the clutter of this world in my hours and mind?  Is there Good Work to do or study and prayer?  Justice to demand? Monastic schedule or spirit-led spontaneity?

One road marker is the fundamental vocation, in my case hearth and family. Nurture Greg. Create a center of peace and support for children, grandchildren, extended family. But when? how? what roles? what gifts?

The opportunities for black funk are many also. Family discord.  The burdens of those I love. Politics. Bigotry. Abortion. Violance. Wars and rumors of wars. Evil in the Church and out of it

Perhaps the greatest temptation is to believe salvation--even my own--is my job alone. The sure knowledge that I am powerless (on my own) in the face of all those things can crush me.  The good news is, I'm not on my own.

As someone once observed, "We play at being God but the almighty has a way of reminding us that the job is already filled."  Or,  as Catherine of Siena put it, "I am He Who is God; you are she who is not."

So what then? Prayer surely. Even retired I don't get the entire Divine Office in, but I can manage at least two legs and frequently three. In the middle of the day it lifts me up.  Yesterday various mishaps practically bullied me into saying the rosary while on the treadmill. I used to use drive time for it, but I don't do that anymore.  Rule of thumb: when down, pray. When confused, pray.

The psalmist tells us that it is the WORD that is the lamp unto our feet. Seek wisdom through the word.

Cardinal Newman wrote more prayers about darkness and confusion than anyone.  I need to remember his dictum:

If I am in sickness, my sickness may serve Him, in perplexity, my perplexity may serve Him. If I am in sorrow, my sorrow may serve Him. He does nothing in vain. He knows what He is about.

Give God space to act. Do not fill it with your own noise!