The Fruits: Gentleness

 

But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control; against such things, there is no law.

Galatians 5:22-23

Gentleness of manner or disposition--this quality is very close to kindness, but it has more to do with mild temper or sweet disposition than anything else. It is how we approach the people we have in our life.

God presents each of us with people every day, passing acquaintances as well as family, friends, and coworkers. In every category, some are more likable than others but we're called to love them all. "Gentleness" is how someone who lives in the spirit approaches the people we are given, particularly those we find hard to get along with.

I recently had a conversation with a friend about relationships with people whose political or religious views and values differ sharply from ours. Worse is when those we're given to love are opinionated, judgmental, and harsh with anyone who differs from them. We're living in an age where political tribalism, religious dogmatism, and so on have us so divided into camps that conversations have ceased to be about ideas and often deteriorate into name-calling and labels. The problems in families over these differences have made holiday dinners with those we ought to feel close to tense and sometimes miserable. It has become such a widespread problem, jokes and self-help solutions proliferate.

Here's a solution: pray for the Holy Spirit to so fill us that we bear fruit in gentleness especially when the people we encounter are difficult and prickly. We can't and shouldn't agree with everyone, but we can treat them with gentleness.  Need a model? The portrayal of Jesus on The Chosen is an example that combines strength and firmness of purpose with gentleness beautifully.

The Fruits: Faithfulness

 

But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control; against such things, there is no law.

Galatians 5:22-23

If the Holy Spirit manifests her fruits in my life at all, this one is probably it. Fifty-two years of marriage is one manifestation. Of course, there are kinds and degrees of fidelity in marriage. The absence of adultery is only one. True single-hearted love in the face of illnesses, family stress, career stress, is harder, as is the distraction of other shiny things. Still, we persist.

I'm a tough friend to lose. Close friendships stay with me decade after decade, some of them for 60, 50, 40 years. 

I could not stay steady in all these things without an enormous flood of grace. That I've been able to do so is nothing but a gift from God who does all. He is he who is God. I am she who is not.

The greatest gift of all and the foundational faithfulness, however, is that I have never wavered in my belief since the day I understood that God existed, and because of that nothing else --NOTHING--matters. I may have struggled with the institutional church but never with that foundational faith. For that grace I am grateful.